Iceberg Technique

           With every drop, the rain hit the water in the river like tears, rolling into a stream of despair. An unpredictable wave of precipitation flooded the river as the torrential sky sobbed uncontrollably. Even the wind seemed to howl in anguish, whipping the rain around and flinging it into the river. Each drop hit more forcefully than the last and stung the surface, creating chaos where there had once been complete peace. Drenched, she looked at the surface of the waterway that was writhing in pain from the jabs it took with every bead of water that hit. She felt certain that she understood the river’s agony, understood the way it wanted to be left alone without the constant reminder that it would soon have to grow. It had never asked to be tortured in this way.

Only a few days ago, she remembered, the water had seemed cool and serene, content with the ebb and flow that it had known for so long. Life had been simpler and the slight ripple of the water had been comforting. Before, she had been confident that no ripple, however large it may have been, could have permanently damaged the river’s confident current. It held its ground solidly and fit within the gentle arms of the river bank. The water was stronger and more magnificent with the embankment supporting it. But with the rain, the ground had given way and the swells in the water quickly became too big for the river to handle.

She watched as the river thrashed wildly, forced to take on more than it could bear. The water sprang violently into the rocks that jutted out from the surface. It seemed miserable as it struggled to keep itself confined, the weeds taunting the water as it splashed over in places, unable to keep control. Finally, the river could no longer compensate for the onslaught of rain. It gushed out of its beaten path and flooded the ground all around it. The pulse of the water reminded her of a bleeding heart, the irregularity of the palpitations causing it to falter in its desolation.

The run did not seem to be going in any particular direction. Instead it continued into the chaos, trying to course against itself and decimate anything in its way. She wondered if it would be easier if she let go of herself and let the water take over. Her mind wandered as she considered how it would feel to fall under the sharp, icy exterior of the water and end it all. She began to yearn for the darkness the black water would provide her with as she edged closer and closer to the place where she could be pulled under the current. Ominously, the water beckoned to her as she pondered how the ripples would wrap themselves around her neck and how the cold grasp of death would be comforting com+pared to the expectations she would have to face.

As she began to slip her toes under, ready to release her spirit and escape the tragedy that she believed was inevitable, she saw a small fish swim by. Against all odds, the tiny creature was beating the destruction that seemed to be impossible to avoid. The fish swam peacefully with the flow of the water and it seemed to revel in the rain that contributed to the water’s girth rather than be disturbed by it. It swam around her toes, happy in its simplistic life within the confines of the river. It struggled to swim around large rocks that obstructed the current and pass through the stronger areas of movement, but, with determination, it succeeded in reaching its desired destination.  As she pulled herself up, she realized the beauty that the fish gave to the body of water. However discontented the river had been before now seemed inconsequential in relation to the tiny bit of life that stemmed from its existence.

The rain slowly began to subside and she watched as the fish disappeared swimming downstream. The water that had escaped the river banks seeped out of the grass, gradually moving back into place in the stream. Though the sky was still gray, the threat of extinction no longer pressed upon the fatigued waterway and the waves became less substantial in rocking the river wildly. The ground unmistakably showed signs that the river had recently flooded, but the swollen banks merely displayed that its obstacles had been overcome. Looking out on the river, she no longer saw the torment that had been so evident before. The water seemed determined to pull itself back together and find its place again.

She focused on that small fish and knew that the river would find its strength. It was collecting itself and flushing away the hopelessness. No longer would it need to define itself by the banks that had held it together for so long. It could survive without them; it had burst forward and sustained itself by its own accord. The agony that had been so evident before now seemed controlled. The river undulated contentedly and treated the rocks and curves in the river as difficult but feasible things to overcome. She knew that the new river would never be the same, but little things, like that tiny fish, would keep it from the brink of destruction. From now on the rain would be a cleansing, a new beginning, that allowed the river to start over and become more beautiful because of its reaffirmed connectivity to the world. Some of the old water that had always been a part of the surge had been lost, but new water had taken its place, water that would make it tougher and assist it as it ventured into the unknown.

The water had become composed and as she looked out on it one last time, the tranquility seemed tangible. Unable to sustain its childlike ways, the river had matured and become one with itself again. Just as the river had, she turned to face her responsibility knowing that she could withstand the torrential downpour for the welfare of the tiny fish. Nothing else mattered anymore.

Hemingway's "Hills Like White Elephants": Style and View Point

          Of all the stories that we read throughout the semester, I still remember “Hills Like White Elephants” the most vividly. I enjoy Hemingway’s style although this piece is exceptionally different from the Nick Adams Stories as a whole. The Iceberg Technique that Hemingway uses really interests me. I appreciated how Hemingway made the story line evident and showed that the story was about abortion without ever directly stating it in the lines. His approach to what would have been a somewhat scandalous topic in the 1920s is subtle and impressive.

             As “the American and the girl” travel the countryside, drinking booze and being somewhat careless, they approach a subject that is not all lighthearted. Hemingway shows us how the woman is thought of as less significant than the man because she is referred to as “the girl” and “Jig,” a nickname, throughout the course of the story. The man’s tone towards her is demeaning and condescending as he describes the “awfully simple operation.” It becomes clear that he is not willing to take the responsibility and is trying to influence her decisions to fit his own selfish wants. Despite his influence, Jig seems more realistic about the situation and her place in the future. She no longer has the future in the palm of her hand; once she has the abortion she will be losing a part of herself as well.

            Even though “the girl” is described as young and not mature in the story, Hemingway makes it clear that she is the more realistic one who is willing to own up to her responsibilities. I was surprised by the point of view that the story takes as Hemingway seems to be unusually perceptive of the plight that the woman faces. When Jig says at the end of the story that “there’s nothing wrong with [her],” I believe she is trying to convince herself that everything will be alright in the end when it won’t. Though many people in class expressed their view of her escaping the situation in the end and deciding not to get the abortion, I feel that the tone in the end of the story is significantly more downcast than that. It seems to me that the American is oblivious to Jig’s feelings and will continue to badger her into making the decision he wants. While the tone of this story is depressing at the end by my interpretation, I still think that Hemingway captures his point admirably. He outlines the controversial view of 1920s’ abortion in a way that empathizes with the dilemma of the woman of the era.

Wrapping Up: Eighth Meeting

           Yesterday was my last meeting with Ibrahim. I brought him a Christmas present filled with typical Christmas candies: candy canes, chocolate Santas, and a candy cane twisted tree. He was excited as soon as I handed it to him and he gave me a big hug. He told me, “This is my first one.” Assuming that he meant his first one of the year, I was quite surprised when he continued by saying, “I’ve never gotten a Christmas present before. Last year we were in the process of moving when the holiday came around so I didn’t get anything.” I couldn’t believe it! I will always be glad that I went out and got him that gift. I know it meant a lot to him but it also meant a lot to me.

            Ibrahim found out this week that he was accepted to Texas A&M at Commerce and he will be moving to Dallas next semester to start his college. He told me he will be moving with his sister but he wasn’t excited to be leaving Fort Worth because he doesn’t like Dallas. He also expressed the fear that he won’t be able to do all the homework that is assigned to him because of the difficulty of writing in a foreign language. I told him that I am sure he will do fine and let him know about the writing centers that most campuses have in case he needed help with his papers. Although he is nervous, I am sure he will do great as he enters his new studies.

            With semester break coming up quickly, I asked Ibrahim if he had figured out his plans yet. He was excited because his parents had surprised him and bought tickets to come visit here in Texas over the break. They are flying in next Tuesday and staying for a few weeks in order to help Ibrahim move and go on a vacation. He told me that they planned to visit Santa Fe, New York, and Chicago while they were here and he couldn’t wait to see his parents again. I told him that I hadn’t traveled much even though I had lived in Fort Worth for about 10 years. He seemed shocked and I explained that my parents didn’t have enough money for us to go places a lot when there was five of us. Ibrahim told me that he didn’t think this was an excuse for not taking the time to see different places because it was worth the money to go and see everything the world had to offer. Although I agree with him and believe that it is worth it to travel, it was hard to express to him the differences in expenses for someone who was trying to pay for their own tuition at an expensive private university.

            As we finished up our coffee, we talked about the university experience that he would be having soon and I reflected on the experience that it had been to talk with him. I generally lead a fast-paced schedule and the coffee break I got to have with Ibrahim every once in a while really helped me to de-stress and recuperate for the rest of the week. It was an amazing experience to help Ibrahim as he finished up his English learning tests and learned more conversational English. I am so proud of all that he has accomplished and I could see his English improve on a weekly basis. It was interesting for me to get to know someone from a different culture who was adapting to America on a firsthand basis and I will look back on our meetings as an event that was vital to making me globally aware in my community here at TCU.

Hemingway's "A Way You'll Never Be": Chaos of the War

           The authenticity that Hemingway writes with when he depicts war always appeals to me and I was pulled in to “A Way You’ll Never Be” because of this. It is clear that Hemingway draws on his own experience in war as he writes about Nick Adams as an American in Italy during World War I. Hemingway even hints that Nick has been serving with the Italian army, just as Hemingway did himself, several times throughout the story. When Nick sees the remains of the battle in the town, we are told that what Nick “thought of, still, as our own dead, were surprisingly few,” meaning that he still thinks of himself as a part of the Italian army. We are given even more evidence of this later in the story when Major Paravicini refers to Nick as “Nicolo” and doesn’t recognize him in the American uniform. The story would be lacking something without the realistic quality that the parallels between Nick and Hemingway’s experiences bring out.

            Hemingway’s portrayal of the battle scene stood out to me because he managed to make the whole picture grotesque without actually describing anything in gruesome detail, but rather by stating facts. This feat seems to be indicative of Hemingway’s writing style as he keeps details to a minimum. The bodies Nick sees are described as “[lying] alone or in clumps in the grass” and all the materials that are strewn about seemed to show me the sense of chaos that Hemingway was trying to get across about the scene. The prayer books that he finds are juxtaposed with the machine guns and pictures of rape showing the disgusting nature of the war. Hemingway drives the grotesqueness of the scene home by saying that “the hot weather had swollen [the bodies] all alike regardless of nationality.” Not only did I get the repulsive picture of swollen bodies, I was also hit with the idea that the war is pointless because, in death, there is no distinction between one side and another.

            After reading “A Way You’ll Never Be,” it was clear that Nick was not only wounded by combat in the war but he was psychologically wounded as well and he cannot fully grasp who he is. He is disappointed that his wounds were “so obvious to Captain Paravicini” and he feels let down that he is not fully recovered from his wounds. Everything has become confusing to Nick. Even his identity seems to be challenged as an adjutant questions his nationality and ability to speak Italian. His train of thought seems to stray when he is talking to other people and he is frustrated by the Major’s attempts to have him rest and be attended to. Finally, his purpose in coming is deemed useless as no one really needs to see the American uniform and Major Paravicini tells Nick that he “won’t have him circulating around with no purpose.” The combination of events in this story seems to me to show Hemingway’s overall response to World War I. The chaos of the story and Nick’s uselessness coincide to give the idea that the war is pointless.

As the Semester Comes to a Close: Seventh Meeting

           Instead of meeting at Barnes and Noble this week, Ibrahim and I decided to meet at Einstein’s to change things up a bit. Both of us were excited to have a break from school and relax with our friends and families. Ibrahim told me about his Thanksgiving dinner with the American family that he and his classmates had visited. They had their Thanksgiving dinner a little early, on Monday, so that they wouldn’t impose on the family for the actual holiday. Ibrahim told me that he enjoyed the dinner a lot and that the food was good. He said he had a good time visiting with his teacher and classmates as well as with the family. He was able to talk to one of the daughters in the family who was a student at TCU so he made friends quickly. I thought it was great that Ibrahim’s teacher set the dinner up for the students because it seemed like Ibrahim had truly enjoyed his experience.

            As Ibrahim and I talked about the things we had done during the weekend, the conversation turned to movies. Ibrahim told me that he had gone to the movie theater several times during the last week to see movies like Jack and Jill and Harold and Kumar. I noticed during our meetings that he went to the movies often and he always seemed amazed when I hadn’t been to see the newest movies that were out. We talked about some popular movies for a while and he explained to me that although some of his friends raved about Inception, he didn’t really understand the whole concept. I told him that it was hard to understand under any context let alone under the grasps of a second language. He told me that his favorite movie was 21 because he liked the logic behind the counting cards and he told me that I definitely needed to watch the movie since I hadn’t before.

Ibrahim and I then discussed his plans for next semester since this semester is quickly drawing to a close. I asked him how his application process was going with the different schools and he told me about his recent talks with UTA. He had called the admissions office at UTA during the previous week and they seemed impressed with the scores on his tests. The admissions lady told him that he would almost certainly be accepted and that they would contact him soon. Ibrahim also expressed his nervousness about picking a career track to me. Although he has not quite figured out what he would like to study for sure, he has to pick something in order to keep his scholarship. He was also surprised by his father’s recent comments about his going to college next semester. He told me that his father told him that it might be a good idea to put it off another semester and take some more classes in English. Ibrahim told me that he did not think that he wanted to put off his college classes much longer and I personally don’t think that he really needs to with the way his English has improved. With all the achievements he has gotten lately, I am excited to see things are going well for him and I am glad I get to help him improve his English along the way.